Canux

Hugh Lauter Levin Associates, a publisher of fine illustrated books ( http://www.hlla.com/ ), is preparing for publication a large
illustrated book titled _Spectacular Canada_.
...we are still looking for an author (preferably Canadian) to write the text. If anyone on this newsgroup has any recommendations as to who might be able to do a good job writing such a book, your suggestions would be appreciated.

Ogr81 wrote;

If you want to sell any books, you should definately choose someone who will propagate the stereotypes of Canadians. Let's face it, we drilled our own little pigeon hole because no-one else would talk about us.
We suffer from the need to be noticed as a nation, but can't even get recognition from the countries next to us. So any time someone with the least bit of celebrity status does something that they claim is uniquely Canuck, we jump all over it and embrace it affectionately.

So why not have said book written to propagate even more Canadian myths.
For example: we have a holiday called Flatterday where everyone celebrates the close connection and protection we've had from the United States for all these years. When the Americans hear this, not only will they be flustered with vain pride, but feel a touch guilty about not really knowing Canada was its' own country. Meanwhile we hide our mouths with our hand so no-one can see us
giggling.
Or how 'bout this: we are a bilingual country - Innuit and Swahili.
We have the most geniuses and drunks per capita then the rest of the world.
We used to be a mosaic until we brutally beheaded all the non-pigmies and became a totalitarian tribe.
The word 'Canada' is actually pronounced 'OllywallybiscuitbarrelPING!' and means 'holder of the firmament' in Swahili, but when translated into English, it
means 'shoulder of the fundament', which doesn't really make any sense.
We put the letters 'ou' in words like 'colour' and the silent letters 'fu' in words like 'basefuball'...
If you put your mind to it, you can probably come up with a book chocked full 'a ton 'o stuff that would cast Canadians in a totally unrealistic and exotic light...
...the only problem is, no-one would read it but us.